Well this is it! Tomorrow is the the CD Release of I Don’t Want to Be Your Friend, a project in the works formally for almost a year and a half, and encompassing songs I’ve written as far back as 10 years ago. I’ve been coordinating the performers for the evening, helping my mother with planning the food, contacting the Maas Building for last-minute requests, and practicing to make it the best show it can be. It seems like not a minute goes by where I’m not mentally bookmarking something I need to remember: in the last minute, it was beer and cups. In the midst of it, it’s almost impossible to concentrate on anything else, and it’s running me down.
Last night, I got a call from my friend Samantha who is playing ukelele at the show. She was asking about some of the chords in the serenade to Dairyland, but she started the conversation, “Are you excited about the show?” Her voice sounded genuinely excited, and she told me that she was really looking forward to it. I, however, realized that I was more worried about it than excited. I have all these pieces to put together, combined with a desire for perfection. Sometimes no amount of “well nothing is perfect,” or “just do your best enjoy yourself” is enough to snap me out of it. But in this case, one “are you excited about the show,” did wonders for me.
I’m not going to stop worrying (not sure that I even could), but I am going to do everything I can to enjoy myself. I’ve got a CD that’s making waves in the blogging community. I’m learning more and more about what I can do to be successful in this industry. I’m improving as a player and a performer. I have scads of ideas for new songs, such as the girl who preferred to write letters, and the ode to Philadelphia. I have some fun projects in the works coming up, including a podcast and a class on songwriting and recording. My life is driven by creative endeavors, and there are days where I feel like the luckiest person alive to be able to explore them.
So even though tomorrow continues to be the opportunity for me to put on the best show I can , I’m also using it to celebrate the confluence of factors that have come together to make me so lucky to be happy. If you’re in Philadelphia, come out and share in the good food, good music, and good spirit of the occasion. I hope to see you there!